So, here we are again – feeling defeated.
You can’t get thoughts of failure and self-doubt out of your head. It consumes you and controls your every move.
Well, what do I do now?
I’m sure you’ve weighed the options: pull an all-nighter and get your shi*t together or stare blankly at the wall until you have your lightbulb moment and get a sudden urge to move forward.
Both of the options are going to lead to burnout.
Well, great… now what am I supposed to do?
This is the part where I would ideally come in and share my “wisdom” on self-doubt and picking yourself up when challenges arise; however, if I told you I’m an expert on either of these subjects, I’d be lying.
Here’s what I’ve learned, and maybe this is something you need to hear.
Unless you want to be stuck in the same place, you need to stop doubting yourself and worrying about failure.
When you worry, you are focused on every POSSIBLE negative outcome. How is that helping you reach your goals? It’s not! It’s only harming your productivity and creativity.
I know self-doubt isn’t like a light switch that you can easily turn on or off – it’s something that you’re going to have to work at every day.
To find the root of your self-doubt, you’re going to have to look deeper.
When did these thoughts start?
What brings these thoughts into your head?
I tend to doubt myself when I start comparing myself to others. Whether it be comparing myself to family, friends, or coworkers, the first thing to knock me down is thinking of where others are excelling and where I am falling short.
I also tend to doubt myself when placed in new territory. This is a natural response for most people, but yet, it’s a hard feeling to shake.
How do I overcome these feelings that are holding me back?
Well, once you’ve discovered the root of your doubt, you need to look at the situation realistically.
Is this something that will get better with time?
Is there something that you can do to make the situation better for yourself?
Is this not the right time for you to be pursuing this?
Do you need to focus on your mental health?
When I started to learn German after taking 7 years of Spanish, I was SO frustrated. Being back at square-one with a language was HARD.
In class, I kept thinking to myself, “I could easily do this in Spanish!”. While that may be true, that was not a healthy thought to focus on.
What I was really doing was making excuses for myself.
It took be a few weeks of “this would be so much easier in Spanish” for me to get it together and realize that I will only get better at German with practice, patience, and time.
Comparing my progress between the two languages created self-doubt with my German abilities, which left me defeated.
Instead of spending time worrying about whether you’re where you want to be or not, focus on the moment you’re currently in. What are you doing right now that is setting you up to get you where you want to be?
If you’re answer is that you’re too preoccupied with the destination, rather than the path there, shift your focus to your strategy.
We spend most of our lives in the “process”. Make sure you’re mind and body are in the same place.
It’s good to have goals and dreams; just make sure you aren’t too wrapped up in where you need to be 5 years down the road. Give yourself credit for where you are now and how far you’ve come already.
Get out there + go get ’em!